I'm not the only one

Here's a story of Gordie's latest experience at Food Town, the grocery store near the school where I teach.

Gordie goes in to buy pickles. As she nears the back of the store, she notices a young man (one of the workers) huddled under an endcap display (using it as a fort of sorts) while another worker hurls produce and jugs of milk at him. Thinking this is strange, she goes up to the register to pay and get the hell out of Dodge.

She buys the pickles and a few other things and runs her debit card through the machine. The checker asks, "Debit or Credit?" G answers, "Debit." Checker returns from staring off into space and says, "Debit or Credit?" G answers again, "Debit." At this point, she is punching her code into the machine and asking for cash back. Checker asks again, "D or C?" G says, "Debit." The machine finishes, and G is standing, waiting for her cash back. Checker asks the fated question one more time. This time, G stares at her in the eyes and enunciates clearly, "DEB IT." The checker purses up her lips, cocks her head to the side, hands on hips and eyes glaring, "WELL YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE FUCKING RUDE."

G doesn't like the F bomb or any of its forms, so she asks to speak to a manger. Manager comes over. She's fake blond with "tangerine dream" complexion and fake blue eyes, wearing a purple bra under her white manager shirt, buttons pulled down to reveal her name (Tyffani) in bling all over her chest. "Do we haff a prahlem?" G explains the situation. Tyff says, "yeah, so?" G explains that she didn't appreciate hearing the F word..." G is cut short by Tyff screaming, "JUST SAY FUCK. JUST SAY FUCK. FUCK FUCK FUCK."

G is astounded. Walks out, only to turn around and see Tyffani up on the top of the register stand gyrating with keys in hand screaming, "Oh yeah. Oh yeah."

These, my friends, are my students and their moms.