Bless their little hearts
Someone told me that here in West Texas, if you say those words, it negates anything negative that precedes it. For example, "Lubbock is the land of inbred crack babies, bless their little hearts." To me, it doesn't really work, but I'm gonna use it for the title of this post anyway.
I quit making New Years Resolutions years ago and just started naming them after body parts (The year of the boobs, the year of Don Eduardo, etc.). Anyway, the reason I don't make resolutions is because I tend to evaluate my life continually and because my resolutions tend to be the same: stop living balls out forward toward the future and embrace the present, try to enjoy the place you are living right now, etc. And today I tried. I tried to live in the present and embrace the city of Lubbock. I got dressed up and took myself out on a date. This date was planned to be dinner, a leisurely stroll through the bookstore for a few hours, and perhaps a stop to rent an artsy movie (no, I don't have netflix--though I may invest in it now). Instead, here is what happened.
I won't go into dinner but suffice it to say I ended up at a chain restaurant amidst a cacophony of people one might see in the merry old land of Oz. The food gave me heartburn, but I trudged on. Ah, the bookstore. You see, there are a few indigenous bookstores here in Lubbock but they close early and are very cramped, so browsing ends pretty quickly there. One actually has a sci fi reading room complete with action figures, which is awesome, but I digress. Anyway, tonight I went to the new Barnes and Noble. This thing is double decker, which is cool, one would think. Oh but in true Lubbock fashion, it so was not.
The place was crawling, infested with yokels and pubescent junior high kids making out in the stacks (the kids, not the yokels, thank god). It was like a roach motel for the inbred crack babies of Lubbock! But I, dear readers, pulled myself into a zenlike stupor and focused on the books. Now normally, I cannot leave a bookstore without spending around 50-75 bucks. I just can't. Call me stupid, but I can't. It's an addiction I have no desire to heal from. And time stops in a bookstore. I'm there for a min of about 3 hours. Tonight, 20 min.
The bottom floor was filled with games and calendars and a nice cafe, actually. I think the business section was there, and the music section, as well. Plus there were the multitudes of endcaps filled with bargain books and features. To my dismay, these were horrid. The bargain books were all democratic party biographies (JFK, Obama), whereas the featured book section involved rows and rows of books written by Mike Huckabee!!! I ran upstairs. They have a giant kid and teen section and half of the upstairs is taken up with a homeschooling resource center! Then the other half contains 2 shelving units of test prep, 4 shelving units of fiction and literature(of which Stephen King and Dean Koontz are a part), one shelf of "Spirituality" which is anything non-Christian, and the rest Christian literature.
It was insane. 4 bookshelves of fiction and literature??? I thought I was seeing things. I actually walked around again to make sure I wasn't hallucinating. This is our bookstore??? This is our fantabulous 2 story bookstore? Oh god. They've closed down all the libraries in town (except 1 which has limited hours), and this is our bookstore!?
So I left to hit Blockbuster which has everything in boxes because they are closing. They won't rent anything, so I bought Sunshine Cleaning. I hope it's good.
God help me. Bless their little hearts.
I quit making New Years Resolutions years ago and just started naming them after body parts (The year of the boobs, the year of Don Eduardo, etc.). Anyway, the reason I don't make resolutions is because I tend to evaluate my life continually and because my resolutions tend to be the same: stop living balls out forward toward the future and embrace the present, try to enjoy the place you are living right now, etc. And today I tried. I tried to live in the present and embrace the city of Lubbock. I got dressed up and took myself out on a date. This date was planned to be dinner, a leisurely stroll through the bookstore for a few hours, and perhaps a stop to rent an artsy movie (no, I don't have netflix--though I may invest in it now). Instead, here is what happened.
I won't go into dinner but suffice it to say I ended up at a chain restaurant amidst a cacophony of people one might see in the merry old land of Oz. The food gave me heartburn, but I trudged on. Ah, the bookstore. You see, there are a few indigenous bookstores here in Lubbock but they close early and are very cramped, so browsing ends pretty quickly there. One actually has a sci fi reading room complete with action figures, which is awesome, but I digress. Anyway, tonight I went to the new Barnes and Noble. This thing is double decker, which is cool, one would think. Oh but in true Lubbock fashion, it so was not.
The place was crawling, infested with yokels and pubescent junior high kids making out in the stacks (the kids, not the yokels, thank god). It was like a roach motel for the inbred crack babies of Lubbock! But I, dear readers, pulled myself into a zenlike stupor and focused on the books. Now normally, I cannot leave a bookstore without spending around 50-75 bucks. I just can't. Call me stupid, but I can't. It's an addiction I have no desire to heal from. And time stops in a bookstore. I'm there for a min of about 3 hours. Tonight, 20 min.
The bottom floor was filled with games and calendars and a nice cafe, actually. I think the business section was there, and the music section, as well. Plus there were the multitudes of endcaps filled with bargain books and features. To my dismay, these were horrid. The bargain books were all democratic party biographies (JFK, Obama), whereas the featured book section involved rows and rows of books written by Mike Huckabee!!! I ran upstairs. They have a giant kid and teen section and half of the upstairs is taken up with a homeschooling resource center! Then the other half contains 2 shelving units of test prep, 4 shelving units of fiction and literature(of which Stephen King and Dean Koontz are a part), one shelf of "Spirituality" which is anything non-Christian, and the rest Christian literature.
It was insane. 4 bookshelves of fiction and literature??? I thought I was seeing things. I actually walked around again to make sure I wasn't hallucinating. This is our bookstore??? This is our fantabulous 2 story bookstore? Oh god. They've closed down all the libraries in town (except 1 which has limited hours), and this is our bookstore!?
So I left to hit Blockbuster which has everything in boxes because they are closing. They won't rent anything, so I bought Sunshine Cleaning. I hope it's good.
God help me. Bless their little hearts.
Labels: inbred crack babies, lubbock
posted by Cranky at 9:03 PM
1 Comments:
As fellow book addicts, we feel your pain. I actually just said to Sean "I'm reading Kim's blog about her crazy republican loving Barnes and Noble from hell." So sad. I can't imagine leaving a bookstore in just 20 minutes... Your town bothers me...
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