Might as well have gone to Catbirds

The Davenport is still evil. I have no Vault, no Dew, no food in the house. I'm eating Gu.

Good God

I just looked at my running log for the first time, and I have logged 270 miles on my itty bitty tootsies and my running shoes since i started training at the end of May. that, my friends, is freakin' insane. That is farther than it is from Houston to San Antonio, from Houston to Austin, and even from Houston to Dallas! In fact, it is the exact distance from Houston to my friend Gomez's house in McKinney. Craziness!

Tomorrow marks 2 months until my actual marathon, so my coaches are kicking us into high gear. Gone are the miles under 15, sadly. And gone are my breakfasts at Tapatia and dinners at Maria Selma's. Sigh. My new nutritionist (the old one was sent to the hospital for anorexia) is kicking my butt and putting me on a serious training regimen, foodwise. I think I shall get really tired of fruits, veggies, and grains, but it should improve my running times and help me beat the heat. And, of course, there's the addition of water, which though improved, I've still not hydrated enough.

So I lived it up this weekend in Austin on a party boat. Actually, Saturday night, I watched Alien Resurrection, Crouching Tiger, and 300 at a friend's house (great film), but I think that her boyfriend and his friends are the ultimate computer geekazoids, and I say that with all due reverence. They had 3 routers next to the TV, 5 laptops opened and operating while watching the film, and about 4 more in bags next to the computer. They could tell you how many Star Trek films each android in Alien had been in and exactly which frames of the movie 300 were exact replicas of the graphic novel pictures. I felt, well, out of place and ignorant but definitely awestruck.

Sat morning, I awoke to the sounds of Code Monkeys which was a combination of Atari 2600 and Nintendo NES. Actually, though incredibly unPC, it was quite clever. Ach, I've been infected by geekdom. Then we all went to breakfast at this "ice house." Only in Austin will you see an ice house for yuppies. This place was crawling with them and their little kids in Hawaiian shirts and slacker khakis. The best part of the morning, though, was this little boy who, unlike the other little boys playing Galaga and Pacman, sneaked over to the corner, grabbed the janitor's broom and began sweeping the place, much to the chagrin of his 78 lbs eating disordered mother. I have never seen a scrawny woman move that fast. She literally slapped his hand screaming, "NO NO That's what [insert racial slur] are for." I couldn't believe my eyes/ears.

Then we went out on the boat, which was a blast, and I've now turned my skin from Casper white to a nice toaster strudel brown, and that makes me happy. I can't wait to show up at work to hear all the tsk tsks they'll give me. Seriously, the Clear Lakeans are uberobsessed with SPF. They berate their kids for the slightest pink cheeks and then lather them with 4 kinds of products to get rid of A B C and D rays or whatever. Sometimes I wonder if these people are so empty that they have to find things to worry about. Seriously, I've got some problems they can have if they really want something to be anxious over.

Ah well, the weekend was great, and it was awesome to hang out with BCL and her brilliant computer gurus. I wish we lived closer. Then again, it wouldn't take me too long to run there. :-)

but on another note

The place I work has 5 videos entitled The Godmen, The Godmen 2, Gods and New Ages, The Door to Satan, and some other one on cults. WTF?

The Satan one is freakin' hilarious, and there's a sister one to that, but I can't remember the title. I'll look it up tomorrow. It's got this picture that is indescribable. I've got to scan it and post tomorrow.

The girls, Vajeesus and Don Eduardo

So I've been too cranky to post, but since my little Clustrmap thing started over recently, and now I don't have those cool giant red dots all over the country, I feel like I should provide some posts. (That was the longest sentence I've ever written on this blog).

So I'm looking at past August posts for inspiration, and I found that August of 2006 was a wonderful year. I finally came to terms with my boobs, after making the resolution to on Jan 1, 2006 via phone to Glinda. In fact, my post on Aug 7 was all about how I patted them in the shower to show how much I loved them. AW.

Then there was the post on Aug 17ish, when G and all of the angels were hanging out at the birthplace (and birthtable) of Don Eduardo and someone, I'm thinking SFV, named her hooha Vajeesus.

Then there was this night. Ah, I can still smell the pre-puke. And the day after.

And that was also the month of the mysterious bruise that G gave me when I tried to haul her ass up the stairs and into her bed safely! Said bruise got me many looks at work and even a comment from my boss. At least she didn't nail me to the wall.

And all I can say is that this August, I've spent most of my nights at the hospital with grandma, most of my days at work with the crazies and with the cp who makes my ass twitch (and not in a good way) and my week off moving grandma and trying to find a place in the cool part of town. Alas, there is no said place, so my ass has to move to the only freaking apt in Stepford...er, i mean Clear Lake, and THEY can't even decide if I'm good enough for them. Seriously, they have called references, and it has been 5 days since they took my money, and they still haven't made a decision as to whether or not I'm cool enough to live in their Disneyfied crackerbox. Vajeesus!

So in 2 weeks, I may be homeless. Seriously. Homeless.

I WANT AUGUST OF 2006 BACK!

NO NNO

I know you've all been worried about me. I've been on this good-hearted, philanthropic kick with this marathon and have turned into a kind, optimistic soul (or something akin to that). Well, never fear, Cranky is here.

Tonight is National Night Out, a ridiculous evening started most likely by a bunch of moms who had nothing better to do bc their kids were being watched by nannies and bc their husbands didn't pay enough attention to them. They even have awards for the best NNO party on the NNO website, but I digress.

The thing is, if I invited my friends over and we sat on the front lawns in our lawn chairs drinking beer, these same yuppie fucks would all sneer and call us white trash. Call it NNO, and it suddenly becomes worthy of socialite status.

And the worse part is that the only two people on the street that weren't invited to this little soirée were the reclusive man down the street who walks his three legged dog and ME. Perhaps it's because they know that if they invited me to their stupid shindig, I'd decline, but it's still offensive that they don't even ask. And what's even worse is that the only reason I found out about it was because I was out for my evening run, and I heard them all making comments about how I was wearing nothing but short shorts and a bra. THEY ARE CALLED TRACK SHORTS, THANK YOU VERY MUCH, AND THE OTHER IS A FIONA SPORTS BRA. What should I expect when all of these women around here wear long skirts to run in. I'm not kidding; when they walk the dogs or run, they all look like this .

And can someone please explain to me why their pasty white children have to wear long sleeved LAYERED tops and skirts to play outside in 110 degree weather and 98% humidity?

Well, I'm gonna pull out my bottle of Evan Williams and sit out on the front porch in my PJs with the banjo guy I just met in the park while running. We'll invite over the recluse and his 3 legged dog, too. NNO, my ass.

still here

I'm here but am wiped out and haven't had the time to write. Trying to find a place to live. Helping grandma move to rehab center. Visiting grandma in hospital--she has an infection from too many antibiotics which, ironically, is treated with antibiotics, go figure. Working. Prepping for my planning week off next week. Plus running. It's just crazytime, and the last thing I want to do is blog.

Maybe being away from work will put me in the mood to write again. Sometimes that place sucks the life out of me like a Dementor.

Speaking of which, just saw the Potter movie. Best one yet.