At the risk of offending the Warrior

This pic was on Yahoo when I was trying to log on to my email. Made me laugh.

Encore

Now my week can finally end on a good note--an encore performance of the god warrior. Plus, I think there was some "never before seen" footage. She's so damn slothful, too, even when she's yelling. Her face is animated, but she's slumped down or sprawled out all the time.

Still priceless. My comments still stand.

This time, though, I'm left with a sadness because I'm reminded that I grew up with those Southern bitch types my whole life, and it makes me physically ill (though not vomiting and having olfatory hallucinations) to watch the closed minded disdain and hatred on the women's faces as they just blatantly dismissed that poor woman as a human. They came in armed for battle immediately. You could tell. Makes me sick. Empty headed people. Much like this.

Southern fundamentalists should learn to shut the hell up, really, or pay attention to their WWJD bracelets. I am a Christian (and when I see this written, it reminds me of that song-- I am a C...), but I'm sickened by people who destroy the emotions of other people in the name of their faith. Worse yet, these people believe in sex for mere procreation most of the time (stay away from "the sex trap" for god's sake), and thus breed their sickness. People get the feeling that Christians are all nutjobs because the Fundies are so damn vocal.

Reminds me of class last night. A girl asks me to be her partner on a project. Then she found out where I lived and freaked out. "OMG THERE! I mean--er---I went to a gay bar once. It was fun." Then when I suggest that we meet for coffee to plan out the project, she suddenly becomes freaked out and says, "um...that's ok. we can just meet here right? Ok, bye." I guess she thought I was asking her out. Whatever.

Blucch. I need to go listen to my godwarrior CD.

Before I sign off, though, what the hell was with her freaking out about the dryer?

It's been a hell of a week...

and I'm brain dead, so here's a meme to get me blogging again. Ever been so exhausted and so filled with crap to write about that you can't even muster up the energy to write at all?

True Colors

1. From where you are sitting right now, list an object that is one of each of the following colors: red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple, white and black.

A red marker, an orange pencil, a yellow highlighter, a green newsletter leftover from Christmas, a blue post it note, a purple pack of lifesavers, a white envelope, and a black telephone. I am a boring person. I have no life but teaching and being a student.

2. What color do you wear most often? Why?

I don't know. I try to vary my clothes. I have my closet organized by color and article.

3. What color are your eyes? What color do you wish they were?

They change colors--sometimes blue, sometimes grey, sometimes green, sometimes aqua. I like my eyes the way they are. No hate relationship there.

4. What color is your desktop image?

Oranges, reds, golds--it's an autumn scene

5. What colors are your walls and floor?

In this room, brown and black.

I was the 683rd person to take this week's Monday Meme.

Only the Candyman knows

WTF is my Laffy Taffy and why do I want to shake it?

I thought I was pretty down with sexual metaphors, but I can't even think of a part of my body that looks like, tastes like, smells like, is shaped like or pulls apart like laffy taffy, but then again, I'm pretty naive.

I am surrounded by inbred crack babies

University of Houston--What a ridiculous institution! I haven’t gotten my parking permit. It’s 3 weeks into the semester for the class for the job that I'm leaving. I’ve called to change my address with them and changed it online 4 times. They still send things to my old address.

Anyway, I haven’t gotten my permit, so I’ve called several times to complain, and they keep sending the permit to my old address. I keep getting $40 tickets, and when I call to dispute it, they say that I have to come down in person Monday or Tuesday before 4 to dispute it at “court,” and after that, they have 21 days to make a decision. In the meantime, starting today, Chuck has to leave work early to drop me off because if I get another ticket, I get booted or towed. If I get booted, I’ll have to wait until the next Monday between 8 and 4 to dispute the boot in court.

The thing I don’t understand is that they have record that THEY made the mistake, and they are still racking me up with tickets.

So I go today and wait in line. On the UH website, they have an online form for appeals for parking tickets. I had filled out the form to save time, but when I got up there, the woman grabs my online form and walks off. I waited 5 min for her return and finally asked some woman in the back wtf was happening. She says, "Oh, you were supposed to fill out the form in that box." Well the form in the box was the same form as online but in triplicate. The woman, apparently, had gone off to make triplicate copies of my form but got into an "intellectual" conversation about the movie "Slyah." Her friends hadn't heard of the movie Slyah, so they all said "Slyah. I ain't never heard of no Slyah." and her retort was, "Slyah. You know. Slyah." This banter went on for another 4 minutes until some lightbulb balloon said, "OHHHHH SLYYYAHHH!" Then somehow it was deemed that Slyahh meant Sly and the Family Stone.

At that point, she decided to come back to the counter and hand me my copy of the triplicate and then go back to banter. I said, "Um...so do you need the copies of my receipt showing that I paid for my permit in December?" She said, "Well, if ya want to attach 'em." I said, "Yup, I wanta attach 'em, puleez." She said, "Oh, now you're speaking my fucking language so I'll be fucking nice to you because since earlier you spoke like a normal human, I didn't understand you and thought you were a fucking foreigner, and since I'm from Texas, I hate foreigners..." [paraphrased].

So then I made the mistake of asking her how long it would take for my appeal to go to "court" and then be given a decision, and she said that it would be best for me to pay my ticket because if I don't pay my ticket in 21 days, they will boot my car the next time they see it, parking permit or not. Um...where is the logic in this? I say, "well do I get a new parking permit at least?"

Then she pulls out my parking permit. It's in a fucking USPS box with 1400 other ones, still in the envelope sent to my old address with a big yellow USPS sticker on it that says return to sender no forwarding address. She hands it to me, and I have to laugh.

Now my other crack baby story. Those of you who have been following my blog since the beginning might remember me telling the story of the crack baby school I worked for in the summer. Well, I got a call two weeks ago from them saying that their accountant needs my social security number for the tax forms to send me. (Um...why don't they have my ssn?). Anyway, I call them back and talk to the owner of the school. I give him my ssn and my new address; plus, I follow up with an email sending my new address and saying that I gave the owner the ssn. So today, I send them an email because i haven't received my W-whatever, and they send one back saying that the called their accountant today and need my ssn. Um...hello...crackbabies...what the hell? I sent an email back and said that 2 weeks ago I spoke to the owner (the writer of the email) and gave him the ssn and the address and followed up with an email. I'm waiting to hear back.

WTF? I mean, am I nuts? Please validate that I'm surrounded by inbred crack babies or I am going to have to commit myself.

BTW, anyone up for Memphis at the beginning of March?

So this is why I hate inservices

You scored as Peter Pan. Your alter ego is Peter Pan. You are a child at heart. Anything you believe is possible, and you never want to grow up. Peter Pan 81% Ariel 75% The Beast 75% Sleeping Beauty 69% Cinderella 69% Donald Duck 63% Goofy 56% Pinocchio 44% Snow White 19% Cruella De Ville 13% Which Disney Character is your Alter Ego? created with QuizFarm.com

Caller ID

I have to wonder why it is that people call and leave no message, then later complain that you never called them back. Has caller ID replaced the common courtesy of leaving a message? Is it the modern day Victorian calling card? If a person calls and then does not leave a message, I assume that their call was not important. Am I wrong in this assumption?

Ah well...back to my online quiz vice.

You Are a Classic Martini

You area sophisticated drinker, who knows that simple quality is over-rated. You're a knowledgeable drunk, but sometimes you're a know-it-all when you're blasted. You should never: Drink and gossip. You tend to forget who's standing right behind you! Your ideal party: Has a real bartender. But no one mixes a better drink than you. Your drinking soulmates: those with a Chocolate Martini personality Your drinking rivals: those with a Margarita Martini personality

What Flavor Martini Are You?

My own version of Groundhog's day

Well, it's official. I've been here two years now. Tuesday marks the 2 year anniversary that I started my descent from Chicago into Texas, crying the entire bloody way while Edgy tried to console me that Texas would be ok and that I could always visit Chicago.

Yesterday marks the day that I woke up in Arkansas and thought, "It's not too late. I can turn back." But I didn't. I drove right on into Helltown during the middle of the superbowl (which was in Houston that year).

Today, though, marks the day that I, dressed as a couch because my clothes were all covered in wine that exploded from the freezing temps in my car, started work at HCC, met TwoShirts and Glinda (the only plus), and started a life of hell that seems to replay itself every fucking day that I awaken to the sound of ImaTool and Doofus in the morning, "It's a wonderful morning to be alive," and drive off to yet another job that sucks the marrow from my bones.

Now, to celebrate, I plan to go to bed, wake up tomorrow to ImaTool and Doofus, hopefully see my fucking shadow and crawl back in my little hole to hibernate for 6 more weeks. By that time, it will be Spring Break.

Cheers!